"Helping Children VIEW Their Anger"
by Ron Huxley
by Ron Huxley
Chronically angry children often have trouble
gaining insight into their aggression. This can
be due to immaturity or stubborn
defensiveness. One way for parents and
teachers to help angry children understand
and cope with their anger is to use the
acronym V.I.E.W.
V stands for “validate.” Whatever the reasons
for a child’s anger, validate the right to feel
what they feel without condoning any
inappropriate behavior. Anger is a natural
emotion. A child who must squash angry
feelings will only find them to rise up even
stronger next time.
I stands for “investigate.” Anger is rarely a
solitary emotion. Sadness, grief, hurt, or fear
are often silent lurkers behind anger.
Ineffective efforts to quench anger may be due
to the fact that other emotions are fueling its
fire. Ask questions about what led up to the
child’s anger and investigate anger’s
accomplices. Label them for what they are
without judgement.
E stands for “expression.” If anger is a natural
emotion and other feelings can accompany it,
then encourage a child to express all of their
emotions clearly and without hurting self or
others. Allow the child to voice their sadness.
Let fear be released into conversation.
Redirect children to negotiate instead of
fighting. Model how this is done.
W stands for “working.” Chronic anger
doesn't always go away quickly. Be patient and
continue working the other steps in this
acronym. Utilize various resources in the
community to assist your child’s anger
management. If one approach doesn’t work, try
another one but keep working at it faithfully.
And most importantly, practice what you
preach!
gaining insight into their aggression. This can
be due to immaturity or stubborn
defensiveness. One way for parents and
teachers to help angry children understand
and cope with their anger is to use the
acronym V.I.E.W.
V stands for “validate.” Whatever the reasons
for a child’s anger, validate the right to feel
what they feel without condoning any
inappropriate behavior. Anger is a natural
emotion. A child who must squash angry
feelings will only find them to rise up even
stronger next time.
I stands for “investigate.” Anger is rarely a
solitary emotion. Sadness, grief, hurt, or fear
are often silent lurkers behind anger.
Ineffective efforts to quench anger may be due
to the fact that other emotions are fueling its
fire. Ask questions about what led up to the
child’s anger and investigate anger’s
accomplices. Label them for what they are
without judgement.
E stands for “expression.” If anger is a natural
emotion and other feelings can accompany it,
then encourage a child to express all of their
emotions clearly and without hurting self or
others. Allow the child to voice their sadness.
Let fear be released into conversation.
Redirect children to negotiate instead of
fighting. Model how this is done.
W stands for “working.” Chronic anger
doesn't always go away quickly. Be patient and
continue working the other steps in this
acronym. Utilize various resources in the
community to assist your child’s anger
management. If one approach doesn’t work, try
another one but keep working at it faithfully.
And most importantly, practice what you
preach!
| Anger Management Groups led by Dr. Lyle Becourtney, licensed psychologist |
| Anger Management Groups led by Dr. Lyle Becourtney, licensed psychologist |
Call for your
appointment:
(917) 968-0965
appointment:
(917) 968-0965
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Other Articles of Interest
Anger Can Be Positive
Anger Isn't Always Bad
Compliment Sandwich
Anger Tools for Families
Cost of Anger
Eliminating YOU Messages
"Temper, Temper"
The Imperfect Parent
The Lecture
Anger Can Be Positive
Anger Isn't Always Bad
Compliment Sandwich
Anger Tools for Families
Cost of Anger
Eliminating YOU Messages
"Temper, Temper"
The Imperfect Parent
The Lecture
More Articles of Interest
ANGER SMART: "Spiritual Relaxation"
Building a Harmonious Home
Don't Make Me Start Counting!
Eight Simple Anger Management Tips
Four Styles of Parenting
Improve Your Health and Relationships
How To Relieve Stress, Anxiety & Depression
Importance of the Father/Child Bond
Major Myths of Anger Management
The Most Important Role of Your Life!
Where Do You Start?
ANGER SMART: "Spiritual Relaxation"
Building a Harmonious Home
Don't Make Me Start Counting!
Eight Simple Anger Management Tips
Four Styles of Parenting
Improve Your Health and Relationships
How To Relieve Stress, Anxiety & Depression
Importance of the Father/Child Bond
Major Myths of Anger Management
The Most Important Role of Your Life!
Where Do You Start?
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the same curriculum as taught
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anger management classes.
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enter X62K-ACM in the Offer Code
field during registration.
for Teenagers and Adolescents
completely web-based and offers
the same curriculum as taught
by Dr Becourtney in his local
anger management classes.
To obtain a discount, be sure to
enter X62K-ACM in the Offer Code
field during registration.
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Learn how to deal with your aggressive child
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Learn how to deal with your aggressive child
and teach them anger management.