Anger Management Techniques
The anger management skills, techniques, and strategies that Dr. Becourtney teaches in his anger management program
are largely based on the work of Dr. Tony Fiore and Dr. Ari Novick. Detailed information pertaining to their eight anger control tools can be found in their acclaimed book, Anger Management for the 21st Century.
The following is a summary of Dr. Fiore and Dr. Novick’s eight anger management techniques:
Anger Management Technique #1 — Recognize Stress.
This anger control tool emphasizes the importance of understanding how stress underlies anger and how to reduce stress before it turns into anger.
Anger Management Technique #2 — Develop Empathy.
This anger control skill focuses on the relationship between empathy and anger management and how one can reduce his/her anger by learning how to see things from the perspective of others.
Anger Management Technique #3 — Respond Instead of React.
This anger management technique enables one to respond rather than automatically react to anger/stress triggers. Human beings have the capacity to choose how to express their anger and therefore can learn new ways to more effectively communicate their needs, feelings or requests.
Anger Management Technique #4 — Change That Conversation With Yourself.
This anger control technique involves learning to recognize and modify one’s inner conversations. Learning to change that “self-talk” empowers you to deal with anger more effectively in terms of how strongly you feel the anger, how long you hold onto your anger, and how you express your anger.
Anger Management Technique #5 — Communicate Assertively.
This anger management skill is about being able to honestly and effectively communicate how you feel and to respond to things without getting angry or hostile about it.
Anger Management Technique #6 — Adjust Expectations.
Anger is often triggered by a discrepancy between what we expect and what we get. Learning to adjust those expectations—sometimes upward and other times downward—can help us cope with difficult situations or people or even cope with ourselves.
Anger Management Technique #7 — Forgive, but Don't Forget!
Resentment is a form of anger that does more damage to the holder than the offender. Making a decision to “let go” (while still protecting ourselves) is often a process of forgiveness—or at least acceptance—and a major step toward anger control.
Anger Management Technique #8 — Retreat and Think Things Over!
This anger management tool consists of removing yourself from the situation and taking a temporary “time-out” while sticking to some basic rules that are described in Dr. Fiore and Dr. Novick’s acclaimed book, Anger Management for the 21st Century